How to Show Up for Yourself

CURIOUS ON LIFE: THE BLOG vol. 12

Rebecca Guevara Wingler

Creator of Color Language of the Soul Workshop Series

Artist/Creative Life Coach/ Certified TNM Coach

---

"COURAGE STARTS WITH SHOWING UP AND LETTING OURSELVES BE SEEN."

Brene Brown

I was curious about mediocrity vs vulnerablity.

Creative outlets require discipline. And good creative work requires presence of mind, vulnerablity and uniqueness.

When I was much younger, I knew how to numb my emotions, not explore and develop them.

As the decades went on, drinking wine daily wasn't inspiring me to show up to my desires or my higher truths.

In fact, it numbed my emotion and kept me from being truly present in my life.

Creatively because I had talent I created, but I see it was not its truest work. I don't think the vulnerablity was exposed. I had learned to protect it and push it down.

Much later, I had to imagine and remember that I had creativity to explore and cultivate, and to use my mental energy with things I really wanted to do.

To do that required me to really show up for myself. It is a process of peeling back what no longer serves us, and discovering what is needed to expand in purpose.

So how do you show up for yourself?

You can prioritize self care and make time for activities that nourish your body, mind and spirit. You surround yourself with positive people who support and encourage you.

If we are not able to set boundaries and say no when necessary, we risk burning out or becoming resentful and unfulfilled.

By showing up for ourselves, we cultivate confidence & resilience, which helps to navigate challenges and setbacks with grace and ease. We listen to our inner voice, trusting our intuition, and speaking up for ourself when needed.

While it is important to be there for the people we care about, it is equally important to show up for ourselves.

Women face various barriers in showing up for themselves. Some of these are societal expectations, cultural norms and personal beliefs.

Women have often been taught to prioritize others before themselves, making it difficult for them to prioritize their own needs and desires.

So take a moment to check in with yourself.

Are you showing up for yourself?

If you aren't, it's never too late to start.

Here are a few ways to begin:

1. Make small changes,

2. Carve out time just for you.

3. Hobbies

4. Dance

5. Meditation

6. Practice self compassion and affirmations

7. Take time to sit in quiet, even if for 5 mins., and just be, not having to do anything but imagine and dream.

8. Eat healthy Whole Foods and drink clean non toxic or sugary liquid as much as possible.

Remember the most important relationship you have is with YOURSELF, so show up for yourself like you would a dear or special friend.

Showing up for yourself can give you a sense of accomplishment and pride as it's a positive step towards taking care of your own needs and priorities.

It can boost your esteem knowing that you're capable of supporting yourself and achieving your goals, leading to a greater sense of happiness, well-being and personal growth.

Next One Day 2 hour Virtual Art workshop Saturday March 25th. Learn more here

Workshop Info

Thank you for Reading!

With Love and Wonder

Rebecca

Is Moderation possible? ......thats what I wanted to know.....

CURIOUS ON LIFE: the Blog vol. 11

Rebecca Guevara Wingler

Creator of COLOUR: Language of the Soul Workshop Series

Artist/Creative Life Coach/ Certified TNM Coach

---

I was curious about that when I begin thinking about cutting back my daily pour of red wine, a little over 2 years ago..

I had no idea what that even meant or what it would look like for me.

Did I mean I would just drink one glass each evening?

Maybe it meant I wouldn't have a glass (or several) every evening, or maybe just on Fridays, Saturdays or "special events & dinners?"

Usually this internal conversation would be had if one glass to many had been had by me, the night before.

After having wine each evening, for decades, usually beginning at dinner preparations, and cooking,

My tolerance was way high.

I could easily finish off a bottle by myself by the end of a night. Especially during quarantine, when we couldn't go anywhere. I was tired of feeling sluggish and low energy. I began thinking about moderation.

Is moderation possible? yes it's possible, for some.

Clients in the TNM programs or coached by certified TNM coaches can and have successfully moderated their drinking habit.

If a discussion around cutting back resonates with you because you have tried yourself, and have not had the success you sought, then

I have a question for you.

What has "moderation" meant to you?

Has it meant a list of rules....... like the ones I would make for myself? It's what most people do or are thinking about. It makes sense.

The problem is, unless you shift your thinking about alcohol first, you most likely won't be successful in moderation.

Alcohol is an addictive substance, 100 percent of humans on the planet can become addicted.

Very often, moderating our intake doesn't go well because we don't get to the root of the problem.

When you are drinking more in quantity, or drinking more often, then that is a symptom.

Moderating with rules and then breaking them often leads us to drink more.

As a certified coach, I get asked, so how do you shift? The answer and what worked for me is something called LIBERATION VS FIXATION.

Moderation that comes from a place of liberation, means it doesn't matter whether you drink or not!

Alcohol holds NO lure for us any longer when we experience liberation.. You can take it or leave it. No problem.

(I would never have believed that I would be living in the liberation space 2 1/2 years ago.)

Fixation is coming from the other end of the spectrum. When you are thinking and making plans and are plotting around when and how much to drink next.

This type of energy takes up too much space in our brain, internal fighting, and rules. The reality is, fixation is based on fixation of the will, or will power which is not the most effective

So then how do we get to liberation?

Here are a few steps in the process:

1. Compassion for yourself and where you are at. This is not your fault. You are able to make changes but, it may not be working as well as you want it to. You are working on it. You realize it's not your fault but it is your responsibility.

2. Learn as much as you can about alcohol, and your life and how the 2 interact. Get clear on where you want to go,

3. Take a break from alcohol, ..........why:?

Because where you are right now, it's not effective with the shame and blame cycle, around trying to stop or moderate.

You need alcohol free time under your belt, to feel comfortable with out alcohol. Sometimes you need community, or hire a certified quit-drinking or gray area drinking coach, A coach can help and guide you using tools and tactics along with one on one coaching through the process.

I love to say I can drink when ever and how ever much I want to, but I just haven't wanted to in over 2 years!

I began to feel so good and truly had a mind shift around alcohol and everything I thought it was doing for me, that indeed it was not.

As an artist, my creativity elevated to another level when I made alcohol small and irrelevant in my life.

I have married art and coaching to guide clients and participants through transformation to a higher self and purpose.

To learn more about my programs and virtual art workshops sign up for all the news

and learn more.

Thank you for reading!

with love and wonder

Rebecca

LEARN MORE

Next one day art workshop coming Saturday March 25th.

WINE AND MY CREATIVITY

CURIOUS ON LIFE: the Blog vol. 10

Rebecca Guevara Wingler

Creator of COLOUR: Language of the Soul Workshop Series

Artist/Creative Life Coach/ Certified TNM Coach

---

"There is no doubt that creativity is the most important human resource of all. Without creativity, there would be no progress, and we would be forever repeating the same patterns."

Edward de Bono

A glass of wine .....or more was how I treated "studio time" in the evenings.

Daily wine and my art work.

Over the decades, the question of how it would effect my creativity didn't cross my mind..

In my 50's I began to feel less inspired and it felt like the creative flow was slowing a bit, the "down or dry" time seemed to last longer.

The muse seemed further away, I never connected a dull creative spirit and alcohol.

I had a habitual routine with regard to red wine.

I opened a bottle for dinner prep and dinner.

By the end of the night, poof........

it was gone.

Especially during the pandemic.

Having changed that habit, I clearly see that my muses were competing hard with a wine buzz.

Over the years, it slowly was deadening the creative flow.

After drinking alcohol we begin to feel warm and fuzzy for about 20 minutes or so.

As the body attempts to bring itself to balance, the feeling starts to wear off. Wanting to feel that warm fuzziness again, I would pour more.

Alcohol is brilliantly addictive to humans and it is intended to work through our bodies that way, the science is there for us to read.

I discovered something else, I also had a belief around wine.

My belief somewhere deep down was that alcohol made me more creative and allowed the "creative juices to flow."

I'm sure that message had been made loud and clear somewhere along the way.

I understand how one can become less inhibited and believe they are more creative, because they aren't as self aware as before the drink..

Now I see how wrong I was around that belief.

Drinking wine was giving me the warm fuzzies while numbing sad or uncomfortable feelings.

It did that, but in the process it was also numbing all the positive feelings, the creative vibrations and energy weren't free to flow.

To be creative, one needs to be cognizant.

Alcohol is a liquid known by all for its ability to demolish the part of the brain that allow thought and cognizance.

A small, modest, amount may not be as destructive, however, regular and over consumption (3 or more glasses a night had become common for me), will.

It will impair creative productivity over time.

Mind, body, soul - wellness, along with healthy aging, were my motivators in making alcohol small and irrelevant.

Questioning the amount of wine I was consuming, was a good thing to question..

Once I began learning more about alcohol in our society, I became curious and my mindset began changing around it

The energy running through my body is absent of numbing sensations from alcohol.

The sluggish feeling and bloat are gone as well.

Life energy, creativity and divine wisdom can be accessed through mindfulness when I am present.

This life energy is accessible to us all!

We are meant to feel good.

We are meant to be the highest version of ourselves and to give the world the gifts that are unique to each one of us.

It is very exciting and unexpected, that a new purpose is unfolding in my midlife!

I am free to expand and dream!

Do alcohol and creativity complement one another. I don't think so, not for me.

As a creative life coach, I teach others to feel the emotions, through creative expression. Expressing openly, without judgement and control, and leaving it all there..

A wonderful presence of mind sans any boozy haze blocking your dreams or creative flow.

"When I dream, I am ageless."

Elizabeth Jane Coatsworth

Get curious, and be creative with your life!

Thank you for reading,

Until next time with love and wonder,

Rebecca

LEARN MORE HERE